It's been 19 years and so far, and I guess more than anything I've been blessed. I haven't necessarily realized it, but everything that hapened to me in the past has brought me to who I am and now. I've made relationships, broken relationships, strayed from faith, came back, made friends, lost friends, I've lived for my parents, for other people, and most often than not, for myself. But the one thing i haven't been able to succeed in yet is maintaining a commitment. I'm very good at making them and starting them, but carrying them out all the way through until the end is a different story. But the thing was, I've always tried to carry out these commitments on my strength alone. And when my strength faded, my commitment to my...well...commitment faded as well.
And the reason I'm sharing this is because yesterday, I made a commitment to the Lord. For the next year (at least) I'm commiting myself to God and God alone. My heart, my life, my energy, my thoughts, everything that I have been blessed with, I'm commiting right back to the person who gave it all to me in the first place. I will go deeper into this new found relationship that I've made with God this past year and take it to a new level. So in all that I do, eat, pray, read the bible, study, play, missions training, I will do it for no one else but God.
Call me crazy, but I have nothing to lose and everything to gain. This life isn't even mine to live, but through grace amazing I have been given it and much more. It's taken me 19 years to realize this and now i don't have a day to spare. Whether i live 5 years, 50 years, or even 5 months, who cares? I have to thank the Lord for every single day I am given and use it for a greater purpose than my own. And in order to prepare myself for this, i am taking on this commitment. And I am not afraid of failure this time for my strength comes from the Lord.
"If God is for us, who can be against us?"
Romans 8:31
This is my prayer and my written commitment.
"Call me crazy, but I have nothing to lose and everything to gain."
ReplyDeleteAmen.
So funny, it never really hit me that we age one more day everyday. That's why it never feels like you're a whole year older on your birthday. Thanks for sharing, Calvin. I'm humbled and inspired to recommit my life to God, fully and wholly.
Amen. I'm extremely joyful that you have found peace in God. :) It makes me happy to see my friends do well in their lives...
ReplyDeleteKeep it up Calvin. You're an inspiration to me right now. :)
sigh, calvin.
ReplyDeletereading this makes me so joyful. God is so faithful! he always brings us back! i think the last time i talked to you was when you were struggling with your faith... and that was a long time ago. i too, this year, struggled with many doubts but God -- as always -- brought me back. Praise him! i love you calvin, i hope you're doing well and i am excited to keep reading about your thoughts and growth.
"It's taken me 19 years to realize this and now i don't have a day to spare."
ReplyDeleteOh how I wish I can soon come to realize it as well....
"So in all that I do, eat, pray, read the bible, study, play, missions training, I will do it for no one else but God."
AMENNNNN.
Man, only if I could be like this for a day. It amazes me how I can't even be committed for a day. I totally understand what you mean by not being able to maintain a commitment :\ But I'm sure this is a daily reminder to everyone to constantly put God at the center :) Thanks Calvin! This was a big encouragement :)